Saturday, 3 April 2010

not my cuppa tea

I am drinking tea.
You might think, so what? but I hardly ever drink it. People in Holland think because I am English I must drink it all the time. But I don't, I don't really like it. I like English tea, but only in England, it's just not the same here.
However, this is Chinese tea, Chinese slimming tea.
So that explains a lot.
Nah, not really. Thing is, I don't actually believe it will help me slim, more than that, I know it won't.
I guess it's the idea I am doing something, like the buying of soap and Vim gives you the feeling you have already made great progress cleaning up the place.

The other day we went to a party, unexpectedly we got a call asking us to come straight away.
Hmm, that probably meant no-one showed up and they were desperate. I honestly didn't like the idea of having to crank up a dud party and besides, I had other plans, but Peter already had his coat on, urging me to get a move on.
I was not looking my best, never am, but as a rule I make an effort for parties and doctors, a confidence boost, nothing to do with stripping. But I wasn't granted the time now and thought, sod it, they'll just have to take me as I am.

To our surprise, the party was in full swing when we got there.
I was soon engaged in a lively conversation with a amiable, big man with curly hair and a chequered shirt. Beaming at me, actually listening and giving the right answers, I felt encouraged, see, he is interested in me as a person, not checking me out.
I moved on though, who wants to be taken serious at a party?

Back home Peter, the insensitive bastard, tells me: 'You know that big man with the shirt you were talking to? I told him you were going to do the Coast-to-Coast with your sisters and he said you could stand to loose a few pounds first.'
'No,' said Peter, 'it was funny, because he was really sincere, but he immediately realised that could be taken wrong and profusely stated that of course you were a very attractive woman. He actually blushed.'

Oh shut up, you are making it worse, the damage is done now.

Dejectedly I feel about my bra for the calling card an adventurous rock-star/gardener had slipped me.
I suppose he just wanted to get into my garden.........

Now I am sipping this horrible slimming tea, thanks to that oh so congenial and understanding man, who could do with a few gallon of the stuff himself, by the way.

It gives you the runs.

You know, for people who are full of it :)

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